Growing Up With A Physical Disability

My fight began when I was baby...when I was born to be exact...though I guess that fact alone doesn't distinguish me from any of the other billions of people in the world. However, I was born just over 2 months premature, weighed 2 pounds 15 ounces and was 17 inches long. There are pictures where the 1 oz baby bottle was bigger around than my face. What wasn't realized at the time was that I also had a stroke when I was born. It wasn't until I began trying to walk and would only walk on the tippy-toes of my right foot that everyone realized that something was wrong. So after a bunch of different opinions and my grandmother taking me to Children's Hospital in Boston Mass...they finally agreed that I had experienced a stroke. Then it was also discovered that I had epilepsy. My seizures were sound triggered which is not a fun thing. Luckily I didn't have grand mal seizures...I would get scared and freeze up and black out. Things that triggered me were phones, church bells, clock chiming, any loud sudden and/or sustained noise.

When I was in kindergarten I had to wear a leg brace...and any of you who know how cruel children can be can imagine how that was. Luckily for me there was another little girl with a leg brace and we became good friends. All through school I was never popular. For elementary/middle/jr high I went to school with mainly a bunch of snobby kids who's parents had money to buy them the right clothes. Mine were unable to do that. I couldn't play sports and things like the others...my weak right side limited me. I was quiet...I got along with adults better than kids. I prefered books to people and had been reading since 2 1/2. Whether I started out prefering books to my classmates or whether their cruelty pushed me into prefering to read I don't remember.

I was stubborn and wouldn't tell my PE coach about my physical limitations...so from 2nd grade up to the last week of my 8th grade year I was taunted and tormented by him because he thought I was lazy and not trying. I was always last to be chosen for teams and many times he turned the class even more against me. He would say we had to run the mile and if I didn't finish within a certain time frame then every day for the rest of the year the entire class would have to do mile runs. Or other times it would be timed runs (like say 20 min) that we did once a month or so...but then if I stopped to walk even a few steps he would make us run all period or do 30 minute runs every day for weeks. Finally during the last week of my last year of school where he would be my coach I broke down and told him. Maybe I should have told him sooner but I had been afraid that if I got special treatment that the other kids would be even more viscous with me.

My best friend from 3rd grade through High School was Tina. The coach HATED we were best friends and tried to split up our friendship many times. I guess he thought her friendship with me was holding her back because she could play basketball (and did for the school) and he wanted her to run track as well. Luckily for me she didn't let him succeed.

All of this is not to say that I could not participate in ANY sports. I competed in roller skating. The only time I placed first was when I was the only one in my division. My weaker/shorter right side held me back in skating too, but it was something I enjoyed. I know I wished many times that our P.E. class would have a 6 weeks of roller skating, just so for once I would have an edge.

All of this isn't an attempt to get pity or pats on the back. Most of the people who read this will have had no clue I have a problem with my right side, because it isn't something I really talk about much. I just wanted to remind everyone that things like this aren't always obvious, so please don't be quick to judge.